Our most recent veterinary adventure involved no small about of drama and gore* — and resulted in Chinook getting stitches to close a three-inch gash on his elbow. The vet has recommended that we keep his elbows padded at all times,** but it’s incredibly hard to keep a bandage secured around his angular, bony elbow. Being good, nerdy dog owners, we Googled. And came up with this: the S&M dog look.
It also turns out it would cost $68 to dress our dog like a hooker, so we held off pending further advice from the vet. She had the simple yet genius solution of putting a long sleeve t-shirt on him. I thought a fleece would afford more padding, found a fleece that I hated, cut off the bottom half and:
You can see why I hated the fleece and felt no compunction about cutting it up for Chinook. But — over Tim’s protests that “he’s a dog, fer pete’s sake!” — I just couldn’t bear subjecting Chinook to this heinous color. Luckily I remembered that I have a black fleece that was too small,*** so I created a new jacket for him that — after one look — clearly required a hat to complete the look:
* I mean some serious gore, and I am not at all a gory person. So the purpose of this footnote is to request the praise I so richly deserve for dealing calmly with the three-inch gash despite a squeamishness level that goes up to 11.
** Actually, her first recommendation was that we make sure he only lies on padded surfaces, like his bed or a rug. This is simply impossible in with a stubborn dog in hot weather. At night, we stack up layers of bedding stuffed to the edges of his 30 x 40 inch crate, open the window and turn on the swamp cooler and still, by morning, he will have burrowed through the layers to find a nice cool, hard surface on which to rest his elbows. And that’s not to mention the daytime challenge of convincing the stubborn dog to lie on his canvas dog bed instead of the cool hardwood floors. Nuh-uh.
*** Fleece shrinks, right? RIGHT?