Tag Archives: Twitter

New Rule: You get 8 lines for your signature block, no mas!

Here are things that are reasonable to include in an email signature block:

  • Your name.
  • Your title (1 line max; more than that and you have a megalomania problem).
  • Your company name and possibly a *small* logo.
  • Your address (3 lines max; I don’t need to know the name of your building).
  • Your phone number (1 line; no one uses a fax machine; join the 21st century!  And no one uses TTY – learn to send/receive video relay).
  • Your company’s website and possibly one or two other social media sites (e.g. Twitter).

Things that are not OK and just end up making any email chain a total pain in the ass to scroll through:

  • Your email address.  You’re emailing me, you dork!  I have your email address.
  • Giant, complex, byte-hungry logos.
  • Assertions that the content is privileged, confidential, top secret, need-to-know basis only, destroy after reading.  The circumstances and participants will determine this; not magic words.
  • Long-winded ass-covering language that the email does not contain legal advice unless it does and it really doesn’t contain tax advice unless it does.
  • Delusional requests to delete the email if you are not the intended recipient.
  • Lectures on thinking about the environment before printing the email.  These always make me want to print 100 copies of it and then burn them to generate additional greenhouse gases.
  • Anything that moves.

The grumpy old woman email goddess has spoken.  Any questions?