Category Archives: WTF?!

Ivanka Trump Flats with Spikes

There is just so much right, wrong, and weird about these shoes:

{Image:  Ladies flat shoes in black with a row of spikes around the opening.  The are called "Ivanka Trump Cecille."}

  1. I like them.
  2. It pisses me off that I like them and they bear the name Trump.
  3. They are deeply weird.
  4. They are totally badass.
  5. I would wear them with the intent of looking like the lady lawyer equivalent of a biker gang member but would probably only succeed in running my nylons.
  6. Yes I still wear nylons.  Dowdy and proud!
  7. I might just buy them.


Verizon customer support — verbatim

I have a Samsung Galaxy Tab tablet that I don’t really take anywhere; when I travel, I just take a Kindle for reading, and otherwise use my Surface Pro, which can be a laptop or a tablet.  It finally dawned on me that I did not need to pay Verizon $10 per month to never connect this device to the internet, so I decided to delete it from my account.  I thought I could do this little transaction online, but could not find a “disconnect this device” option.  There followed this customer service chat/epic upselling effort with “Charlie”:

Thank you for contacting the Verizon Wireless Chat Team regarding your account. How can we help you today?

Me:  I would like to remove a device from my bill

Me:  I figured out how to “suspend” it but I would like to remove it permanently.

Charlie: Just to make sure I understand you correctly, do you mean switching the device on the line or removing it permanently?

Me:  removing permanently.

Me:  a tablet I no longer use

Me:  and have not replaced

Charlie: Oh my! It’s saddening to hear that you want to remove a device from your account. I will go over the account details to check all available options and fees before processing your request.

Charlie: Let me first pull up the account, may I have your name and mobile number?

Me:  ###-###-#### Amy Robertson

Me:  that’s the number on the account; not the tablet

Charlie: Thank you Amy.

Charlie: May I also have the mobile number assigned to the Tablet that you want to cancel to check its details?

Me:  ###-###-####

Me:  it’s month to month

Charlie: Thank you Amy.

Me:  i thought i had canceled it long ago; so i just want to stop paying the monthly cost

Charlie: Got it.

Charlie: May I know who was originally using this Tablet? What change occurred that made you not use it anymore?

Me:  Long story.

Charlie: If you won’t mind, I am here to listen to make sure we get to the bottom of this and provide you with out best recommendation.

Me:  Seriously, I’m good. All set. Just want to remove this device from my bill. Thanks.

Charlie: I understand. Just before I make any changes, you might be interested in upgrading this tablet to an Ipad. We got a variety of Ipads available and for a limited time, I can give you a $200 discount on any new iPad.

Me:  You are doing a GREAT job upselling me, and I promise I will give you 5 stars on any follow up survey, but I’ve made up my mind: I would like to remove this tablet from my account. Can I ask you to do that now? Thanks!

Charlie: I completely understand. Let me start the process for you now.

Charlie: Please stay online with me.

Me:  No problem. Thanks.

Charlie: Thank you.

Charlie: I am starting the process now.

Charlie: While processing this disconnect, would you happen to know anyone who might be willing to take over this line? It can help someone get crucial and reliable cell service while avoiding startup activation fee of $40.00. It can also help someone get into a brand new device since it’s an out of contract line, like a new iPhone 6s Plus or S7 Edge.

Charlie: Also, if you don’t know someone off the top of your head who might be interested in taking over this line, I can help you get it suspended without billing for up to 3 months so you don’t have to pay for it in the meantime.

Me:  I don’t know of anyone to take over this line. Would like to just remove it from my bill.

Charlie: I completely understand and thank you for giving us a chance of laying out all available offers for you. I already have the validation result. Checking here, we have to wait for your billing cycle date which is on the 22nd so we can avoid the prorated charges on your final/ next bill. Since we already gone through the process, when you call us back on your billing cycle date, all we have to do is hit the disconnect button and the line will be totally removed from your account.

Me:  No, seriously, disconnect it now.

Me:  I’ll pay this month’s charge. I don’t want to have to call back.

Me:  That way I just pay through 3/22 and not after.

Charlie: Got it. I can finalize it now so you won’t need to call back by the 22nd. The line will automatically be canceled once it reaches the end of its cycle.

Charlie: Yes. That will be the case.

Me:  Perfect.

Charlie: 🙂

Charlie: Almost done submitting the request now.

Charlie: All done! I’ve submitted your request to cancel and the line #### will automatically be canceled once it reaches the end of the cycle. No need for you to do anything from your end.

Me:  Thanks very much!

Charlie: You’re welcome! I’m glad I took ownership of your concern today by submitting your request to cancel the tablet line since it is no longer being used.

Charlie: Do you have any further questions or concerns I may assist you with?

Me: Nope.  All set.  Thanks!

Not sure what to think of this

Everyone in our neighborhood just got this email from one of the moms on the block

I think we knew this day was coming…With the warm weather (and growing sense of mischief), [our son] and his 14 yr. old pals have taken to roaming the neighborhood after dark. You may have noticed some tree decorating at our house last night and a roaming band of hooded boys walking openly down the street. What you may NOT have noticed was [our son] hiding in various yards wearing his full ghillie suit (Aussie camo garb) crouching in bushes trying to scare his friends. They seem to mostly be up to harmless pranks and of course, we have tried to impress upon him to be respectful of the neighborhood. BUT, they are 14, and [our son] is now 5’10” and looks like a full size adult. So we thought it appropriate to warn everyone so you would not be alarmed at first sight of them, if you see them. And of course, let us know if they cause real trouble or damage. Otherwise, feel free to holler at them and send them on their way! Expect another warning email in about 18 months when [our son] starts driving.

On another note, [our son is] looking for ways to earn some money over the summer, so if you are in need of dog walking, dog/cat sitting, house sitting or lawn mowing or general yard work help, please let us know.

My first thought was:  but they’re white; what are they worried about?  Their kid is free to dress in camo, hide in the bushes, roam the neighborhood in a hoodie,* and likely survive any chance encounters with the police.

Then I thought:  We live in Denver — are even white parents scared of the DPD?

Then I thought:  Mostly harmless?**  Maybe I should be concerned.

Then I thought:  Wow, what an awesome job rec for your son!  I’m totally going to give him the keys to my house and ask him to feed my pets while I’m away.

Then I just thought wtf.  Seriously, wtf.


*I’m really hoping “hooded” means “wearing a hoodie” and not “wearing that other sort of hood that’s getting a lot of press these days.”

** Though Hitchhikers fans will recall that this was the Guide‘s one-line description of Earth.  Then again, I’m not sure how comforting that is.


Imagine for a moment . . .

. . . that CAIR (Council on American-Islamic Relations) published a photo of Donald Trump with a scattering of bullets next to his head.  How about a Black Lives Matter tweet with photos of police and bullets?  Heads would explode.  Pundits would rant.  Investigations would be launched.  Conservatives would be outraged.

But this?  It’s apparently acceptable for a leading conservative cause to use this image:

Image: copy of tweet from NRA with showing photos of a black woman in a red-checked suit jacket and a white woman in a green turtle-neck and black suit jacket with four bullets arrayed next to the photos.  Text reads:  "sounding off on one of the most ridiculous anti-gun schemes introduced in some time.

Why isn’t this terrorism?  If terrorism is “the use of violence and intimidation in the pursuit of political aims,” this certainly qualifies.  Violent intimidation in pursuit of political aims.  The only silver lining is that they are losing and this shows their desperation.

Domestic terrorism.

We need to call it what it is:  terrorism, home grown and largely ignored.  Armed assholes occupying a federal building.  Terrorism.

Among those joining Bundy in the occupation are Ryan Payne, U.S. Army veteran, and Blaine Cooper. Payne has claimed to have helped organize militia snipers to target federal agents in a standoff last year in Nevada. He told one news organization the federal agents would have been killed had they made the wrong move.

He has been a steady presence in Burns in recent weeks, questioning people who were critical of the militia’s presence. He typically had a holstered sidearm as he moved around the community.

Source: Militia takes over Malheur National Wildlife Refuge headquarters |

Racial prejudice is driving opposition to paying college athletes. – The Washington Post

The article makes very interesting points about the racial disparities in our views of paying college athletes.  But to a sorta kinda labor lawyer, the most striking sentence is this:

In survey after survey, strong national majorities oppose paying college athletes. In March 2015, for example, an HBO Real Sports/Marist Poll found that 65 percent of Americans do not think college athletes in top men’s football and basketball programs should be paid.

Image: Three football players, two in light blue uniforms, one in an orange uniform. The one in orange is African-American. He is carrying the football and jumping to avoid a tackle by one of the players in blue, who is also African-American. Another player in blue, race unknown, watches from the right. I have an idea:  let’s take a poll about whether we want other people who entertain us to be paid.  I’ll bet that if actors weren’t paid, Tim and I would not have had to spend $39.98 to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens.   While we’re asking whether we should pay college athletes, let’s also take a vote on whether college coaches should be paid.  How about other college employees?  Just think how cheap college would be if professors worked for free!

This poll should be dismissed as silly, but apparently asking consumers of entertainment whether the entertainers should be paid is not only a thing but a thing that is taken seriously by the potential payors.


Texas Governor Orders Founding Fathers/Constitution Display Removed from State Capitol (but the Nativity Can Stay)

The governor of Texas removed an approved display involving the Statue of Liberty because . . . Texas has a budget surplus that it would like to redistribute to ACLU lawyers?

Source: Texas Governor Orders Atheist Display Removed from State Capitol (but the Nativity Can Stay)

BTW the headline originally read, “Texas Governor Orders Atheist Display Removed  . . .” but there’s nothing anti-God there, just pro-America and pro-Constitution.  Honestly, the full-support-for-civil-liberties-lawyers theory is the only one that really fits.